Thursday, June 14, 2018

Says Life

Today, I felt sad
I remembered when I was a child
And the time I was left
To tend to my wounds alone

But, there was my sibling
Who was so much younger than I
Who will take care of him and make sure that he eats
So, I stayed

Then comes school and the gift of smarts
The high grades, I was expected to keep
Friends and classmates who needed help
So I stayed

Parenthood came next
And all worries for the future multiplied to a hundred
But there’s my child to take care of
So I stayed

A parent’s death after
Amidst the grief and the pain
Have to take care of the aging parent left
So I stayed

I work, I breathe, I live and I pray
Day after day after day
Happy, lonely, triumphant, trampled down sometimes
But, I stay

And that choice
Weak as I am, human as I am
Is what makes me take on
One other day

Find your reason
Make one up
Who knows tomorrow?
That abyss --- might be a ledge

- Liza
Manila, 061418

Sunday, October 16, 2011

My Young Love Affair

I was just 15 when I started an affair. No one warned me how dangerously addictive it could be. That I’d spend hours just staring off into space, day dreaming and imagining and all those foolish things.

And being young and jobless as I was, I realized that affairs are not entirely free. One has to spend money on them. Add to that, the people that I hurt in the process, my parents.

See, when I got so engrossed and lost in my affair, everything took second place. School and family obligations became such a drag. Understandable right? Young love and all of that.

But, I just had to have it – my Sweet Dreams pocketbook romance.

Who got me hooked

Vanessa, a really good friend of mine since grade school, brought her paperback to school one time. It was titled P.S. I Love You by Barbara Conklin. She was really excited about it, telling us what a wonderful story it was. So, I took the bait and asked to borrow it. Van readily lent it with the note to take special care as it was from her sister, Aileen.

The series

The book was the first of a series of young adult romances. Sweet Dreams had over 200 books from different authors about young love and all its requisite highs and lows. The more popular authors were Barbara Conklin, Janet Quin-Harkin, and Marilyn Kaye under the pseudonym Shannon Blair. My personal favorites were Jaye Ellen (The Trouble with Charlie), Rosemary Vernon (The Popularity Summer), and Joanna Campbell (Secret Identity).

Feel good books

Aside from my natural love of books, the Series became a favorite because reading them made me happy. I still remember laughing my head off (to the puzzlement of those who was watching while I was reading, guess they thought I was crazy) to the circuitous route Charlie (of The Trouble with Charlie) had to take to find love under the very watchful eyes of her older and intimidating brothers. I got to read about the wonderful people and places that were depicted on the books. I realized that teenagers, and I guess people all over the world are basically the same: living, loving, hurting and persevering. It was a gentle eye-opener of what the world is.

Lauding the writers

In this day and age where gadgets seem to rule, I am thankful that I went through that Sweet Dreams phase. My grades then initially suffered but when I learned how to use what I read (my vocabulary and communication skills greatly improved, not to mention the interest it sparked in me in the social sciences), everything went fine.

I have always encouraged my own daughter to read books. There is a lot to be learned and enjoyed from them. And I thank the Sweet Dreams romance paperback writers for they were one of the many that made my teenage years extra special and I guess, sweet.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Father's Day 2011

It's Father's Day again. Greeted hubby and brother. Missed Tatay, wish he was still with us. If I just stop and feel, there's a gamut of emotions that runs through. Too much, too many sometimes. But, why does it seem sadness always come ahead. Unless I push it away. Can't it naturally just give way to happiness without one exerting a lot of effort? I should want to be happy most of the time. There's a lot to be thankful for. But, melancholy is giving happiness a pretty good run of its money. Wish I wasn't the race track. But, complaining as I do, I still prefer feeling instead of being a bystander. So, I guess I should say, "hey, emo, bring it on!"

MassKara Festival, Anyone?

Colors, music, dance, and a touch of mystic? Who would say no to Bacolod's MassKara Festival? Of all Philippine festivities celebrated, this for me, is the closest that depicts every day, human life. From man's simple joys and deepest sorrows, to challenges surmounted and events celebrated, each man and woman dons a mask. That of a noble creature that feels, endures and lives. We are what life makes us. So, live, dance and sing to that intricate, colorful tapestry that is called - life.

"Experience MassKara Festival, Hermosa Festival and Lanzones Festival this October. Airphil Express flies daily to BACOLOD, ZAMBOANGA and CAGAYAN DE ORO from Cebu and Manila. Visit to book!

Thursday, December 03, 2009

My Father

He was a seaman for most of his life. It was what he was born to do, I believe. He was most comfortable at sea than land.

His contract, mostly overseas, left us, his family, alone months at a time. We'd receive mails (no mobile phones then), postcards of beautiful places, greeting cards from him and the occasional phone call when they dock.

I grew so used to him not being at home that when he was there, I felt slightly shy and ill at ease at his company. A price, I believe, that all OFW's and their family share in exchange of the better paying work abroad.

He was a good father, really easy-going. I have never felt any demands from him. He left the disciplining to my mother. In fact, he never once laid a hand or even scolded me.

He was loving but not showy. I just knew, without a doubt that he loved each and all of us with all his heart. He would usually just pat me on the head everytime he'd leave. And call me Anak in that loving way of his.

I was his eldest and what my mother would say, the favorite. I certainly felt like a princess with my Father. The times he was at home from sea, he'd bring me to his office and proudly show me off to his co-workers. He'd bring me to the park and watch me play and we'd eat at his and my favorite restaurant afterwards. And, since I contracted polio when I was six years old, he'd usually me carry me on his back so I won't get tired.

Father always looked so strong and invincible to me then. Aside from his strong and compact build, he had this aura of confidence. As if nothing can faze him. That he can do everything. That he can always make things right for me and my mother.

I felt so secure with my Father. As a child I have never known fear because of him. That is why, even my having polio did not hinder me in any way. Because of his trust and confidence in me, I felt I, too, can do anything as long as it's right and in God's will.

Father, as in most things, was not showy when it comes to religion. We'd sometimes go to Church on a Sunday but it was not a regular practice. Although unsaid, I came to adopt his principle of practicing religion not by strictly following Catholic practices but by trying to live an upright and honest life.

Father was diagnosed with kidney failure January of 2007. It was a shock and though he rallied against it and even went against the doctor's advise of having dialysis, he slowly came to weaken. His weight dropped and it was painful to see him go from my big and healthy father, to the sick and thin one.

He didn't want us to worry and tried hard to hide any pain that he was feeling. He refused to take his meds after a few months saying it only made him feel worse.

He died April of 2009. The two years after he was diagnosed were still a blessing. He was able to finally spend time with us. He and my Mother became almost newlyweds. They got to talk more and spent time with each other.

And, he was able to enjoy being a full time Grandfather to my daughter. He took care of her and spent more time than he was able to do with us, his children, since he was working abroad then.

I thank God for my Father. For blessing us with him. I do not discount his shortcomings but it is only after a loved one is gone that one realizes that those shortcomings were not important after all. That you'd wish you understood them more, hugged them tighter, and loved them better.

Nearly a year has passed since Father died but I still cry most times. We all miss him and pray for him always. He may be gone, but in our hearts, Luisito "Chito" Sabordo, husband to my mother, father to us his children, grandfather to his grandchildren, friend, colleague, he will always remain.

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

Rediscovering the Blogging World

Hey, had to go through a circuitous route just to reopen this blog so I had better make it worthwhile.

Will post in like, an hour or so...

Friday, February 13, 2009

A Red Letter Day at the Blue Water Day Spa

Imagine gazing at the deep blue of the ocean, the grainy sand massaging your feet, while basking in the warmth of your loved ones company...

Hmm, such indulgence need not be a mere cinematic experience. For the Blue Water Day Spa has come up with the World's First Spa Theater.

Now, far be it for me to have my family miss out on such a great relaxing adventure. Why, it would almost be criminal. So, let me whip out my pocket calendar and do a mental rearranging of our family schedule.

My 9 year old daughter will need no further urging to try movie watching whilst lounging in a very comfortable chair. She is also enough of a lady to enjoy the gentle pampering of foot, back and shoulder massage. Now that is definitely a treat off school.

My husband, on the other hand, will definitely sing his heart out in the midst of his relaxing massage. What a wonderful gift to him whose always a bit drawn after a day's work.

And, for myself? Just the thought of lying back and letting someone work their magic on my weary muscles is pure enjoyment. But, with my family there to share it with?

Let me say no more. I'm sure you'll head out there to enjoy it, too. And, know what? What you'll get is infinitely more than what you imagined...